My Love{s}

October 5, 2011

I think in every healthy relationship you go through phases. It's normal and I think it makes your relationship stronger when you are able to appreciate the really good times and work through the not so really good times.  Currently, I'm in the I love you so much, i'm overwhelmed phase (which sadly, I know will pass) I'll always love Nick like crazy but sometimes through every day life, tiny arguments and little tiffs, you forget just how much you love one another-  You know you love one another but you don't feel it in your soul.  I hate those times, but I know that soon, the overwhelming love will come back.  It's the cycle of marriage.  Last night, laying in bed hysterically laughing at nothing and everything was a reminder of how perfectly our lives have fallen into place (even during the imperfect times)  I can not imagine another man by my side.  I'm sharing because I feel like so many younger couples end in divorce because they think the insane love is supposed to always be there- that once they're not feeling so overwhelmed by their love, the relationship is in trouble.  Sometimes, i'm sure thats the case but other times I wish people would really work at finding what it was that made them fall in love in the first place.  I'm no therapist, nor do I claim to be, but the divorce rate is scary and I think this may have something to do with it. What do you guys think?


9 COMMENTS:

  1. Mrs. Lindz,
    I totally agree. Marriage is wonderful but also can be so hard. I too find that my marriage goes through cycles. But somehow, we always find our way back to that place where we were when we first met and we fall all over again. Sometimes its a moment that catches you off gaurd and sometimes its just a look or a smile. (Most of the time for me it's his ability to make me laugh in any situation.) But you have to find things that bring you back to that feeling or you won't make it. I guess that's how we've made it together for ten years so far. :-) I think if everyone at least tried to do that, marriages could last for many more couples... I love reading your blog. Come visit at TCH. We would love to see you! <3 Lauren

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  2. Thanks so much for your comment, Lauren! You totally get what i'm saying and I love your take on it. I miss you guys too- I will try to come up soon! and ps. thanks for reading!! xo

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  3. I have been with my husband for 25 years. I can say that you nailed it - there are crummy times when we don't communicate well and there are those wondrous times when he makes me laugh because he is so perfectly just-the-right-guy-for-me. The longer we are together the more impediments we've put between our ability to easily communicate with one another -children, real jobs, mortgage, car payment - It is truly challenging just to get a word in edgewise. But the funny thing is, even though we often come at things from opposite directions, we always land in the same spot. And I think that is what our love is all about.

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  4. well said lindz! i've certainly thought the same thing and i do hope other young(er haha) couples are reading this. dabbling in a book i rec'd for our wedding that touches on this too. http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/5-simple-steps-to-take-your-marriage-from-good-to-great-terri-l-orbuch/1100298135

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  5. oh, i just love this so much! my fiance and i are young and have been together for almost 4 years. we definitely go through those "do i even love you, because i don't really feel it at all right now..." times, but those make the wonderful and perfect moments all the more wonderful and perfect! so glad to hear someone right about this as simply as you have. :)

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  6. It's definitely easy to settle in to just being "roommates" and not as "in love" when you've been with someone a while. I'm marrying the love of my life on the 22nd, our 5 year anniversary. Love is complicated and goes through changes, phases and cycles no matter the relationship. It's normal. People need to know it's not all hearts, sparkles and fairytale endings when you get married, it's real life and it can still be beautiful.

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  8. Was thinking about these things the other day, Lindsay. Well said. It's comforting to know so many rockstar couples (like yourselves...) have ups and downs and arounds and find their way back to love over and over and over. =) Thank you!

    PS...I spelled your name with an "E" the first post...so I deleted, edited, and re-posted!

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  9. I so appreciate everyone's comments and feel comforted in knowing we all go through this cycle with our partner. xoxo!

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